2. “I may or may not be getting an abs workout right now.”
We hope he likes the show because damn, we’re feeling it in our obliques. Pass the waterbottle and a sweatband, please.
3. “Wow, his sex face is really entertaining from this angle.”
Every once in a while, we snap out of the moment and look down to see his mug contorted in a way that’s either really adorable, really intense, or straight-up hilarious. (We’re only kind of sorry about making this observation.)
4. “I’m tired. Can you go back to doing all the work?”
When we tap out, there’s usually no bringing us back. Bring on the lazy girl sex, please.
5. “Where do I put my hands?”
There are so many options: his chest, the bed, smashing his face in to the pillow. Should we hold hands? Is holding your own boobs a thing? Maybe we should be checking our email.
6. “It’s messy bun time.”
There’s something super hot about whipping our hair back and forth mid bang, but after a hot second our Victoria’s Secret waves start throwing off our sex game. Hair, bye
Between the leg workout we did yesterday and the weird 45-degree angle of our legs right now, some hip or butt crampage is to be expected. Please excuse us while we scream and take a hard lean to the left.
8. “Really regretting having barbeque for dinner right about now.”
Apologies for the TMI, but sometimes this position in particular gets our insides churning. There’s always the fear that the fart we feel coming on might be something else. Our bad, in an effort to keep sh*t real, things got gross, fast.