Have you ever reached the glorious moment of achieving a goal only to realize that you feel empty inside instead of fulfilled and satisfied?
Have you ever avoided the completion of a goal because you are scared of success?
It’s so easy to be committed to working towards a goal all the time and not necessarily to reaching it. Why would anyone be addicted to hard work but not be committed to actually achieving the end goal? It seems silly when it is put so simply, but the reason is also simple. When one goal is complete, a scary void opens as the unavoidable question arises, “Now what?”
Do you spend what feels like maximum time and effort striving for things that make you feel worthy only to get there and realize that your self worth still isn’t complete? Consequentially, you turn to the next goal for validation, and it becomes a vicious cycle that robs you of the joy of a job well done. This happens because we tend to derive our self worth from the process of feeling like we’re doing something. The pressure we put on ourselves to be working towards something constantly is way bigger than our desire for money and freedom; it is about proving our own self worth.
And when you attach your entire self worth to your life’s work, you end up on a never-ending search for validation.
Why? Because your life’s work will never be complete until–you guessed it–your life is over! Thus, it’s impossible to achieve our own validation this way before death, and who would be crazy enough or willing to wait for that?
If your remedy for treating the emptiness inside is to throw yourself 110% into a fury of hard work, you are treating the symptoms instead of the root of the problem. It’s like putting a Band-Aid on a malignant tumor. Whether or not you choose to pay attention to the cancer, it will spread, harm you, and affect the way you live and operate in daily life. And, when you are forced inevitably to face the issue at some point in the future, you will deal with the consequences of having let the disease fester and grow into a much bigger and more complicated problem.
“Okay,” you may be saying right now, “but how the heck do I adjust this pattern to start getting validation and satisfaction now, before I achieve my next goal?”
Well, this is such a COMMON struggle, but I think we have all seen examples of those people who “have it all figured out.” Yes, many people who look happy on the outside are in complete turmoil on the inside, but I’m talking about those people who really have it together. Men and women who radiate peace, happiness, joy, love, good will to others, service, success, completion–in short, everything that represents living a centered and worthy life.
It all stems back to the secret of self-love.
These people carry a sense of validation and self-affirmation that is not transient; what happens today, tomorrow, next week, next month, 10 years from now, etc. does not change who they are or what they are worth; a person who has self-love already believes and trusts him or herself completely and does not strive towards the achievement of goals to prove anything.
Imagine the difference it would make in your life if you already sincerely valued and trusted yourself instead of feeling the need to prove yourself.
Imagine how powerful your maximum time and effort would become if you already felt validated and affirmed. What would be the impact on your life and business with a breakthrough in self-love?
When I learned how to completely fall in love with myself, every aspect of my life changed for the better–my confidence, my relationships, my work, and my spiritual, mental, and physical health. For years now, no matter what ups or downs I am experiencing, I have woken up every day with a smile on my face and a genuine enthusiasm for life. Everyone wants to feel this way, and I have made it my life’s work to spread the key to love and happiness.
Self Help on Huffington Post